ethics, good behavior, good manners, grace

because NICE matters

When did we become so mean?  You read that right.  After picking myself up one more time, and dusting myself off, I was reading Jen Hatmaker’s blog and some thoughts from Dr. Ben Kim and they both helped me put some words to what I have been feeling. flying pig airborne

WWJD?  News Flash! He would be NICE!  Yeah, you have seen the bumper sticker, the colorful rubber bracelet and surely you have heard the song.  WWJD? Yep, no question about it.  He would not laugh at someone for being scared about some medical procedure.  He would not gently suggest that you eat a steak and have a glass of whole milk and your medical condition would be cured.  He certainly would not under any circumstances, tell you or anyone, you are not that sick and you are wasting the doctors’ time.   He most certainly would not say, you need to pray harder then & only then, I will grant your “wish”.  Yes, I am well aware that many people want to spit out scripture verses.  They want to hide behind the idea that you should rely on the power of prayer.  I am hear to tell you no matter what denomination you adhere to or what pile of scripture verses you have memorized and pass out like free samples of chocolates in front of a chocolate shop…………..people are forgetting to be nice. Take that Bible thumpers, yes you!  Yep, somewhere in those pages, maybe even between the lines, there is a message.  BE NICE.  period.  We can debate the “meaning” until the cows come home.  We can debate if this is what was meant by this or that.  We can continue to judge others and their actions or we can stop being ninnies and use our brains.  It is pretty much tied up with a gorgeous orange bow and placed in front of us.  Wait for it……here it is…………….. BE NICE. When you choose to be nasty and ugly it is down right mean and it HURTS others feelings.  Yep, some people have become so mean, they take pride and feel uplifted in making other people cry and sob buckets of tears.  They are stomping on the momentarily weak and they are taking delight in it.  That or their mother’s didn’t raise them with good morals, values and certainly they missed the boat on good manners.flying pig two

I can 100% guarantee that if you called up either of our boys right this minute, told them how ugly someone was behaving…..they would say, oh, hope my mother doesn’t know them, because she will make you scrub her kitchen floor until it gleams and then write an apology letter to the person and hand it to them personally.  You will never make that mistake twice.  ever.  Being a human means having Grace.  Shouting; have Grace, have some Grace at two little boys probably was not going to get the job done.  Scrubbing a kitchen floor, sweeping my driveway or raking leaves gives everyone some time to breathe and think about behavior.

Now, when the boys were younger, I said if you have enough time and energy to be mean, then you have enough time and energy to scrub my kitchen floor.  It also gave me time to think of how to correct their behavior.  There were a couple of years in a row that my floor was spotless.  The message was received loud and crystal clear.  My kitchen floor scrubbers up and flew the nest.  Anyone want to come scrub my floor today?  Looks like I could use a “volunteer”.  I actually have a few people in mind that would benefit from some good old fashion work and crafting an apology letter.

Here is a poster that I read.  I liked it.  I have not stopped thinking about it for about two weeks now.  It is hard to really, really believe it and act upon it.  I am still working it over in my brain.  “Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you – not because they are nice but because you are.”

Have we lost all semblance of kindness?  Is criticism and ugly behavior the plague of our generation?

Recently on a cooking show, I saw a run down looking tavern, two old guys run it.  They have a full house almost every single night.  There is a sign on the door.  BE NICE OR LEAVE.  Pretty much sums it up.

Recently a person gently suggested that I revisit what it means to be a friend.  Okay, I have really tried to come up with some good thoughts on the matter.  flying pig

 If you’re not sure about someone, remember that how they consistently behave is far more important than what they say.  
Your time on planet earth is your greatest gift.  Don’t waste any more of it with people who don’t cherish you with their behaviour.
People don’t generally change deep within.  If they don’t adore you right now, don’t wait and hope for them to adore you later.
More grace.This just might heal the world, mend relationships, sooth our inner turmoil. It could grease the machine of humanity and keep it running rather than grinding to a halt, stalled out for lack of mercy. It reminds us we are brothers and sisters, not demigods over one another. It is the way Jesus came, and it is precisely what saved our souls.
I have to wonder, each time I am knocked down and didn’t think for a minute that I could feel this low……….I have to think I must be healing.  “Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.”  I am learning new lessons every day.  I must be making some headway?
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2 thoughts on “because NICE matters”

  1. In the words of Mother Teresa… “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.”

    I applaud you for speaking up for niceness and manners and just being human…you are a treasure and I am happy to call you friend!

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