next year

Did you just feel that?  It was a slight shift in the universe.

I walked out to my mailbox and found an envelope hand addressed.  You know that moment when you sift through the grocery ads, the junk mail, maybe a bill (if you still receive paper bills) and a padded envelope with a book you ordered for one of your Grands… spy upon high quality paper, his and your name, written in cursive?

DSCN4274I jostled everything under my arm, so I could open the fine quality envelope to get to the good part.  The gift.    Yes, a handmade card is a gift.   Take your breath away, hand-made, card from a friend.  The moment I slipped the card from the envelope, I forgot who I thought I was for a moment.  The very instant I saw the simplistic beauty, I said out loud, “I need to figure out what to barter, so she will make me 24 of these for next year”.

The greatest gift of Easter is Hope.

One of the shocking and interesting things that happened to me this past year, was the hyper awareness of the calendar.  Oh no, this could be my last Thanksgiving!  Oh, goodness, this could be my last New Year’s Eve puzzle!  Oh no, this could be my last piece of birthday cake!  What?  A new Grand on the way?   I need to make a quilt as fast as I can!  I ask Mr. Right all the time, do you think this is my last____________ fill in the blank?   I can tell by the wrinkle line on his forehead, he is loosing his patience with me asking.

Once I found out that I was extremely ill, I, like so many others, I walked back through my life and decided what was important and what was poppycock.   I have made excellent choices in the past year.  I made choices to see family and friends.  I have been nicer (if that is possible) to our dog.  I try to be more loving and kind to my husband.  I tell people I love & appreciate them.  I tell my daughter in law what a GREAT mom she is.  I tell our adult children how proud we are of them.  I try and write more sincere and kind thank you notes. I try to live my life a little more Grace filled.  I am more Grateful. I am much more choosey.

I have also made better and more informed choices about my health and wellness.  Each day I am getting stronger.  Daily I fill my pitcher with sass and swirls and vim and vinegar.  Maybe I am drawing from my past?  Maybe when I was a “terrible two” I was stubborn and strong and feisty and sassy?  I am quite sure that was an exhausting phase for my mother.  Maybe somehow I needed the practice?  Perhaps I needed to know that I could be strong and sassy, should the need arise?  Maybe today, I am utilizing every bit of that feistiness to hold my head up, get strong and lean and fit and plan for another day or week or month or year?

Somewhere in my months of poor me, I am sick, no need to plan for the year/s ahead, I should go eat worms……….a slight zig-zag began, fresh air happened, 1051 biked miles happened, yoga happened, juicing happened, people helping me happened, research happened……….. then today, something small yet significant happened, something shifted……….. I am GOING TO BE HERE NEXT SPRING, I NEED TO PLAN how many beautiful, hand-made Easter cards I am sending out.   I enjoy sending out Good wishes to our friends and family.  Easter week is a holy tradition in our beliefs. We love sharing that pure goodness, that Holiness with our circle.

Heartfelt and Sincere thanks to my wonderful friend for the gentle reminder, something that I had misplaced……….there is HOPE.

(I HOPE you love this card as much as I do,  I will be mailing them out next year)

Happy Easter, to us all.


12 thoughts on “next year

  1. Esther Milller

    I’m so glad you loved receiving it as much I as did sending it! Happy Easter to you & Mr. Right……
    Love you both 🙂

  2. This is a powerful message. I have a catch in my throat, and I’m having trouble spinning out the words to respond to your heart message. The bottom line is hope. Have you read Viktor Frankl? He boiled down the meaning of life to…….hope. You said the same thing: it’s all about hope. Thanks for sharing Esther’s message to you. I’m encouraged.

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