30 stars of kindness

SourwoodHello, beautiful September.

I am just starting to see a little color on the leaves.

Awwwww, late at night, I can feel autumn in the air.  Just a hint, it’s coming…… cool days, sweaters, hands wrapped around mugs of coffee while sitting on the porch, fall leaves……….  I am sort of giddy about it.

Are any of you up for a challenge?  I double dog dare you!

30 days of self kindness & grace

What the heck is she talking about?  She has taken a leap right into the river.  She is one crazy chick.

The beginning of fall, back to school, back to routine, time to regroup and steady ourselves before the holidays march into our lives.

When I worked outside the home, the month of September was a full, busy, chaotic time of the year.

I used to take a couple weeks before and fill a little box that fit into my desk with emergency supplies.  You know, important stuff?….. a few snack bars, a new tube of great colored lipstick, a small tube of new amazing smelling lotion, a new hair clip, a couple stamped post cards, a pretty barrette, a length of ribbon, fancy spritzy water etc.  When life got too hard, I could slip into the restroom and put on fresh lipstick and tuck my hair up and rub some fresh lotion on my arms and TA-DA, be a new refreshed woman in less than 5 minutes. Or take a 5 minute break at my desk and jot a post card or tie a ribbon in my hair or snack on a delish fruit snack.

It didn’t take much to get back on track.

The time has come to refresh and fill up that beautiful empty pitcher.  Not one of us canempty pitcher handle everything.  Life is hard, tricky, quirky, strange and a little bit scary. You have heard it a million times…you can’t pour from an empty pitcher.  You gotta fill up the tank now and then. You have to recharge and put a little sparkle back in, so you have some left over to share.

I am not talking about a glorious vacation of gelato and beach sand for ten days. Nor am I talking about shirking your responsibilities.  No, your kids are not going to get up on their own and get themselves to school.  Dinner won’t magically appear on the table for the next 30 days, nor will the dog brush him or her self.

  What I am talking about is doing one small thing a day for the entire month…..just for you.  

What?  SHE IS NUTS!  I don’t have time.  I am busy. I work.  I have a family to care for.  People depend on me. I have an important job.  I care for others.   How could I possibly do something for myself when there is so much to do?

News flash my fellow over-doers…… to survive and also THRIVE we must be nice to ourselves. We must be a bit kinder, sweeter to us.  If we don’t….well it isn’t a pretty picture.

I use Kris Carr’s , Crazy Sexy Love Notes.  I choose a card every day.  It helps me take care of me.  It is a stack of cards with gentle suggestions on the back.  Spring for the $10.00, so worth it.  https://www.amazon.com/Crazy-Sexy-Love-Notes-52-Card/dp/1401948286/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1472781976&sr=8-1&keywords=kris+carr+love+notes20160901_190503_resized.jpg


Do I have to gently remind you to put on your own oxygen mask first, before you can help others?  Oh, it is so very true.

We have all seen folks, who volunteer too much (in the name of charity, giving, religion, service hours etc.), care for others, do way too much for our kiddos, give ourselves too long of a list of “must do’s”.  We all know people who have somehow placed the importance of their daily jobs/careers above family and self.   Yes they are still upright and walking around.  Their hair is a bit frizzled, their skin is pale and dull, the sparkle has left their eyes.  They are making poor food choices and don’t have time for anything.  They always seem to be “exhausted”.

While volunteering, giving, donating, being there to serve and help,  are all valuable traits……I am just wondering, typing out loud here folks……..maybe, just maybe if we take a moment or two a day…FOR OURSELVES.  Then maybe, just maybe after 30 days of doing this…. we might be better at volunteering, giving, donating, doing for others, we might be better partners, better parents, we might be better at our jobs…. ?

Oh, just think of the possibilities.

We all NEED a big dose of gentleness.  We are task masters when it comes to ourselves. We are much too quick to skip our own care in the name of helping someone else. We need to be nicer to ourselves. Self care, self kindness, grace …….whatever word you want to use. We don’t even have to use words.  I vote for sticking a star, or drawing, earning one,  on each day of the month of September.

Every single time you do one thing for yourself, you get a star.   That’s it.  That is the entire challenge.  Do something nice for yourself, one time each day. Then put a star on the calendar. 

A gold sticky star.  A star drawn with a purple gel pen.  A plain black ink pen.  A pencil.  A fancy drawn star with shooting flames and a smiley face.  I am quite sure, some of you techno- advance folks can somehow put a star on your smart phone calendar.  purple star sticker

I just thought maybe we could help each other out?  Share our ideas with a co-worker or friend.

Just think, when we meet up on October 1, we will have 30 things to share.   30 pieces of grace that we gave to ourselves?  For no other reason than we are worth it.  We will be better people in 30 short days.

You can go on line and type in lists of self care.  You could brain storm at the dinner table tonight.  (wait, you do sit down to a proper dinner and have conversation, right?)

I am serious, I would love it if you share an idea or two or 20 in the comments.  I need help here with little ideas of goodness.  Off the top of my head, here is a list of ideas;

take a long hot shower

home manicure/pedicure

make a lovely home cooked meal

sew the button back on your sweater


take a nap

watch a trashy television show

take a long walk

get a massage

read a good book for pleasure

just say no

be a sofa girl

listen to your all time favorite song

put on new socks

go to the gym

buy a string of twinkle lights

walk your dog

listen to music

figure out your top 5 song titles

put on lipstick

buy some star stickers

enjoy one of your favorite comfort foods

buy some fresh cut flowers


pull some weeds

make and enjoy a great cup of coffee (said the Seattle girl)


watch a funny 2 minute video

buy ingredients to make your own trail mix (put the cool jarful on your desk , in the car at home near the computer

Make yourself a glass of fresh juice

begin to write a list of 99 things you love


make a cup of tea or hot cocoa

hang a seasonal wreath


In this together folks, here’s to our mental health and wellness.

Today, I slipped 3 charms on a thin purple ribbon.  I am wearing it like a necklace.  The three charms have the initials of my three grands.  I am smiling.

I drew a purple star on the calendar square.

Here’s to 30 stars!!

Bit by bit , together we will fill up our pitchers.

twinkle lights pitcher



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