to have and to hold

One of the lovely things about having your own blog is that you can write about really wonderful celebrations and relive them by writing and reading them over and over.

I have been unable to pursue my hobbies for the last six months.  The old noggin just would not work enough to allow me to cross stitch, sew, quilt, practice the piano, read a recipe …you get the idea.  So when an opportunity presented its self, I forced myself to try.  Taking that first leap back into my hobbies and passions, felt really good.  A bit scary, but the time had come and I was more than anxious to begin again.

One of my favorite things to stitch is a lovely heart-felt piece for a friends’ birthday or a brand new monogram.

Today, as I type this, a young couple of “kids”  are getting hitched.  Tying the knot.  Making it legal.  Stomping on a glass.  Jumping over the broom.  Sealing it with a kiss.   We have the pleasure of knowing the grooms’ parents.  To say they are beside themselves with joy is the understatement of the year!  Everyone is so happy and excited for this union of two souls.  Their hearts are intertwined and will be for ever more.   We send the new couple and their families our heartfelt and hearty congratulations and our very best wishes!

I for one was over the moon happy.  I went to my sewing room and got out a lovely piece of oatmeal colored Irish 28 count linen.   I found my graph paper and started the process.  Yes, I love the process.  I love choosing the fabric, the thread.  I love deciding the curls or the straight lines.  I love deciding the size of the font.  I adore choosing the perfect frame when it is almost completed.  Finding that center point and making a stitch helps me find my beginning.  I adore that very first stitch almost as much as the last. 

When I stitch for a young couple I try to pray for them as I go along.  I wish them health and happiness in their marriage.  In the middle somewhere, I had to stop and rip out several stitches (because I use hand dyed thread, I have to get it out of the linen quick like a bunny as not to stain the fabric).  I am constantly checking and counting and double checking to make sure everything is going along according to plan.  Even with a couple of set backs and mistakes repaired, I was smiling through the process.  It felt wonderful to be back at “it” again.

As I stitched along & the hours slipped by, I prayed for their lives together.  I hoped for them a good solid beginning to a wonderful family life that will unfold before them.  I wished them oodles and oodles of respect for each other.  I wished for them good times and common sense on how to approach and deal with the bumpy times.  As I stitched, I want them to remember that Mr. Right and I will be in their corner, always.  Lifting them up and praying for them.  We will continue to set a good example of how married folks treat each other.  We love, respect, adore, honor and yes, play practical jokes on one another.  Marriage seems to be a difficult and tough relationship to figure out.  When you hear of someone making the choice to marry, help them out. Lift them up.  Stand silently in their corner and wish them goodness.  Invite them to your home for dinner.  Make the effort to show how much value you see in the life they have chosen.    When your friends are about to celebrate their 39th Wedding Anniversary, for Pete sakes send them a card!  Tell them how happy you are for their celebration of love.  Stand up and be counted.  Make an effort to remember these special dates.  Good gravy, Hallmark must sell those anniversary cards to someone?  Or be a little crafty and make a card!  Yes, you read that correctly.  Cut out some magazine pictures and glue them on a piece of card stock.  You do not have to be the best trained card maker.  Make the effort.  We all need to help one another.

Here’s a thought:  What if every single person who attends the wedding/reception today also sends the newlyweds a one year anniversary card?  What if every single person who sent these two young people a card in the mail this week, also sends them a card May 2014?  What if we all sent yearly cards of encouragement to celebrate year after year?  What if this young couple had to answer to oodles and oodles of friends and family about what fun and happy things they have woven into their first year of marriage?  Oh sure sending a case of toilet paper on their first “cotton” anniversary would be silly and goofy and funny, but what about remembering to lift them up in prayer and sending them a card to say you have them in your heart?  Would it make it more real?  Would it build this relationship into something very, very difficult to break apart?  Would it be easier for young couples to make it through the first year or two or seven?

As I stitch the brand new monogram, I have this feeling of privilege that I have chosen to step into.  Stitching their letters together makes it seem real.  Oh sure, the state of Washington will take their money and offer up a piece of paper that says it is real.  A person of the cloth will say all the right things and offer up their blessing that will make it sound and feel real.  When I took a pen to the outside of the card and wrote Mr. & Mrs.  for the first time for them, it seemed real.  I can’t begin to tell you the feeling in my stomach when I put that very last stitch into the gift.  In my own very real way, I marked the ceremony and after  working those letters together, I have lifted up my voice to say:  I am so happy for you!  I am delighted to share in your goodness!  I lift up my needle and thread and salute you with sincere and heartfelt celebration!  May this union of two hearts and souls be bathed in the goodness of a great marriage long after my thread has faded.

Congratulations Mr. & Mrs. Jackson!

“…and the two shall be called one.”  Matthew 19:5

out with the old

Leaving the safety of vacation at the ocean was a tough trick this time.  Yes, we both needed a break from what has become our routine.  We both needed to breathe in some fresh ocean air and take the time to regroup.  It was fun and happy and relaxing and healing and calming.  However, when it was time to leave, the tears came.

We have been vacationing on the Oregon coast for 29 years.  We took a few years off when we lived in North Carolina, Alaska and Europe (we even managed to sneak in a trip while living in Oklahoma).  We started with a couple different hotels and cities.  We do love Lincoln City, Newport, yet Cannon Beach seems to always draw us back.  We always have a fun and enjoyable, refreshing and renewing trip.  No matter for an overnight or five days.  This time leaving was different.  I sobbed and sobbed.  It just was so hard to leave with the knowledge of coming home to more medical tests and procedures.  I completely understand that we both needed a break and time to regroup, I just never imagined it would be so darn hard to come home.  Don’t get me wrong, we have a really good life and a wonderful home, I just didn’t realize how much stress and fretting and the pressure of living with being sick is and  I have associated with being at home.  The ride home was okay.  Mr. Right bent over backwards to chat and bring up good discussions.    He was juggling it all and did a fine job.

It has been hard to settle back into a routine.  I simply feel unsettled, jumpy.  Once again, a friend steps in to rescue me.  She wrote a very insightful and helpful note.  Here is part of what she was gently telling me:   I will never forget where I was when I received devastating news or information in my life.  One thing I do believe in is sage burning and brushing to clear the air and take bad chi and memories out of a room. I have also repainted and rearranged and redecorated rooms to reclaim them for my healing and signify moving beyond the trauma.   She offered to come over and help.  She offered her time to help me heal.  She always helps me see the Light!  Have I mentioned what a smart (organic, whole wheat, agave nectar sweet) cookie she is?

In the last few months, in amongst all the yuck going on in my life, we have purchased a new sofa and family room chairs.  In addition of waaaaay tooooo many new shoes and boots, a new family room rug, a new pillow & a chair recovered which have all added a fresh new look, I have been buying new clothes like we have a money tree in the back yard.   I seem to be buying and convincing myself that exchanging old for something new and fresh will some how “help”.  That by replacing “stuff” with new and bright will somehow bring healing into our home.

Then it hit me…………….of all places the shower.  We had a beautiful (really, really pretty) dark green with brown swirls shower curtain.  The color was rich and deep and I dare say magazine page worthy.  It threw the deepest shadows and it was a safe little place to sob my heart out and no one could hear.  It was a place to let go of a ton of bottled up do-do.  In addition to being so beautiful the fabric was even more so because it was a fancy schmancy designer label that I found at a local Ross store for a very small sum of moola.    Every time I looked at it, I had a silly smile on my face.  Gosh, I am a good shopper.  Golly, what a great buy on something so lovely.  Almost on a daily basis,  I came up with some perfect sentiment, regarding what a wonderful choice I had made.    Recently, I started mulling around the idea of buying a new shower curtain.  How could I ?  I adore our shower curtain.  I need to start looking and looking and looking.   Something was out there that would top our “old” perfect shower curtain.

Mr. Right recently bought a new shower bar that bends out from the shower.  It allows a shower curtain to hang in a semi-circle in place of the straight across version we are all so used to.  I must admit it really opened up the space.  It sure didn’t feel closed in.   He also installed a new shower nozzle.  Same as the last, this one has two heads.  He thought it was time for an upgrade.  We fully admit that we are shower nozzle snobs.  We do love our shower.  I purchased new organic soaps and tossed out the old stuff.  Even bought a new loofah mitt and a new bath puff.

One of the good things about my friend is that she always wishes me is healing white light.  Always.  It warms my heart and soul.  It makes me feel like somehow I can over come even the toughest of days.  So, I marched out (well, not really, Mr. Right drove me) and I found the perfect new item.  I purchased (with no coupon, however it was on sale) a stunning, most lovely, beautiful solid WHITE shower curtain.  It has dandelion puffs ”burned” into the white fabric, tossed here and there.  Like making a wish.  After I ironed it (which was a huge accomplishment in itself), Mr. Right hung it up with some clear, pretty flower shaped hangers.   It looked nice, not take your breath away, page 87 of a before and after magazine shot….  simply, clean, new and nice.

Next morning, I had forgotten all about it until I stepped into the shower.  As the hot steamy water poured over me the WHITE LIGHT surround me in pure goodness!  The much larger area filled with healing white light.  It feels lovely.  Every single day that I step into that shower, it makes you forget all your troubles and sing.  Yes, I said sing.  It is a light, healing, open space that has been put together with the idea of healing and wellness.    Who knew with my love of color and patterns that a solid white shower curtain could lift me up and bring a sense of wellness into my life?

Wonder if my friend will come over and clean out and bring some space and healing power to my closet?  Can’t hurt to ask!  She might have to bring extra sage to burn, as my  closet is in no way uplifting, nor light, nor cheerful.  Let’s start with all pink clothing?  I wonder if the smell of burning pink clothing will be as healing and cleansing as the sage?

tied with a ribbon

In our home, as each birthday card arrives and for a week or two after the celebration we display the greeting cards on little stands and clutter then around that.  It is cheerful, uplifting and fun to look at the jumbled mess of color splashes and silly pictures of elephants, balloons, flowers, umbrellas, more flowers and this year a rather jaunty otter!  I usually tuck in the mother’s day cards I have received as well.  The cards come from our children, grandgirlies, godchildren and usually one from the dog, haha.  Lots of flowers pictured with gorgeous hues and usually a silly one thrown in for sass.  They are a jumble of sizes and colors and texture.

A couple of days after the celebration, I look at each again and either cut out a favorite picture, put a couple up on my sewing room bulletin board and sadly toss the remainder.

I just can’t seem to do it this year.  I still have all the cards up and I keep looking at them.  I love the sayings and the silliness.  It makes me happy to have them where I can see them and grab some of that good feeling again.

Secretly in my cedar chest I have packets of cards.  I have them tied with various fat luscious satin ribbons.  One stack is from my 16th birthday.  One stack of cards is from our 10 year vow renewal.  I have the stack of cards tied in a beautiful, silver, satin ribbon from our 25th wedding anniversary.

I know this year was not a “special” number or a special occasion.  I just have this feeling, when I go to take them down, I will find a saucy, bright and cheerful polka dot ribbon that I can use to tie up all the goodness and put them in my cedar chest.  I just can’t let it go this year.   Just not ready to throw them out.  Somehow I need to hang on to them.  They seem to be helping me and making me feel better.

Birthdays have taken on a new celebratory meaning.  Here, Here to the person who decided we should take a moment each year to celebrate the goodness of life.  Being the party girl feels lovely.   Celebrating for a week to mark the occasion was a wonderful idea.  Next year, I plan on doing the same.

Seeing these wonderful little cards of artful pictures and photography and silliness, reminds me ever so gently to put my heart and soul into cards that I send to others.  You just never know what a difference they make in someone’s life.

 

be nice, it matters to mankind

Being civil to one another costs nothing, zero, big goose egg.   We all know the people who need this reminder, lesson, do over in manners….will most certainly not read this or if they do, they will not think it is about them.   It is just me venting with the hopes that it may gently or not so gently remind people we need to treat each other with a bit more kindness.

When we had little toddlers of course we taught our children to say please and thank you and the correct moments.  We practiced and reminded over and over and over.  We also did something else.  We taught our children to be civil to others.  Yes, good manners are very important in our family.  Other families it is not top priority.  However, being civil in a public arena is something that we are forgetting as a society.  Yes, I know you are more comfortable behind a computer, or looking at your phone.  That is fine and dandy.  Please remember that once in a while you are around real life humans and need to act appropriately.   If you don’t know what good manners are………….just pretend to be nice.  That’s all folks.  Just be nice.  Stop being so darn tootin rude!  Yes, I am talking to all ages, not just the youngin’s in our life.

That means, before someone came to our home, we told the boys.  Mr. and Mrs. Warner will be stopping by tonight.  Please come out of your rooms, say hello, shake hands, (the adults will fill in the small talk) then you can politely excuse yourself and head back to your game boy or drawing pad.  When driving up to a restaurant, an awards luncheon, someone’s home…..we helped them.  When we get to the restaurant, Mr. and Mrs. Durgin will be there as well, please look them in the eye, shake hands, call them by name and say hello.   Sometimes the reverse was the case and we would be sitting down in the living room, or already seated at a restaurant.  If that happened, we would quietly and gently remind the boys (as we set the example) to stand up when an adult comes into the room and greet them.

What I see happening is people are not making the effort to make their fellow-man feel wanted or appreciated or of value.  When you make an effort to go to someone’s home, if you are not greeted in a way that makes you feel comfortable, you will most likely not go again.  When you make your entrance at the work place and three out of four people do not say hello until you say hello and  try to make them come to the party…………you like them a little bit less each and every time.   You do not stomp your foot and get red-faced angry, you just find little reasons not to be around those people.  Sure you continue to say hello, it’s what you do, but you stop making an effort to include them in your circle.

Emily Post said:  “Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others.  If you have that awareness, you have good manners.  No matter what fork you use.”

If you don’t know what in the world I am talking about, let me put it into clear sentences or spell out the rules if you need them…………..Say hello to the maintenance worker at the hotel.  (I don’t care, if you don’t speak their language.)  It matters.   Say hello to a fellow co-worker when you or she arrives in your work area.  (I don’t care, if you have seen that person every day for 17 years.)  It matters.  Nod your head and offer up a cheerful hello to a fellow beach comber.  It matters.  Say hello to the neighbor (I don’t care if they are grumpy.  You have no idea what cross some people are carrying.)  It matters.   Say a friendly hello to your balcony neighbor at a resort (you will most likely see them again in your three or four-day stay)  It matters.

You are making the effort and saying Good Afternoon for YOU.  It doesn’t matter if they say hello or not.  It matters because that is the kind of person you need to be.  It matters because it makes the day go smoother for you.  It matters because, yes Virginia, being nice matters! Being kind to each other matters.

Now don’t get all crazy and goofy acting.  I am not suggesting that we all poke around in each other’s business.  We do not need to tell perfect strangers our names, or our situations, or the reason we are there or what our plans are for the day.  I am just saying a simple Hello or Good Morning will suffice.  Seriously folks, just a simple civil greeting of the day.  Good behavior, good manners, being civil is what our society is structured around.  It is a solid foundation on which we all build lives.  Seriously, it is that fundamental.

“The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.”  Fred Astaire

apples, perfume & flies, Oh My!

Apple update:  Braburn…….. 84 cents, juicy, good apple smell, pretty outside color, a bit soft for my tastes, drew a sad face on my paper

Pink Lady….63 cents, good color, good apple smell, sweet, nice snap, a bit of a nice tang, drew a happy face with curly hair.

Thanks for the suggestions, I am trying my best to locate and try every one.  I am still eating them with a bit of almond butter and I still love the combination.

FABULOUS by Isaac Mizrahi…………tried the little teeny sample spray while away at the beach.  I must say, I think I am falling in love with it.  I will try another day or so to get a good feel.  Yes, I am still committed to Oscar de La Renta and Mr. Right loves that stuff.  I just like trying a new scent every now and then for something a little different.  NO, I do not put it on my skin.  I spray it on my clothing.  Yes, I know it will stain the fabric or worse…………I am not willing to put that directly on my skin.  The packaging says “a modern mix of clean sensuality and confidence with a mysterious allure that leaves you craving more….”  Gee, how long did it take them to come up with that?  I would say it has a light floral scent, doesn’t smell cheap and it smells pretty.  done.   Love the polka dot top too!

While visiting several shops and galleries in a resort town recently, we noticed zip loc baggies hanging from door ways with a cup or so of water in them.  Supposedly it works as a natural trick to keep the flies outside.  I am in the middle of my experiment as I type.  I did see a fly in the bedroom earlier.  Maybe left over from yesterday?  I will give a full report soon.

Did somebody say beach?

We are taking a couple of days off to play at the beach.

Here’s hoping we come back looking like a prunes, from too much swimming, hot tubbing (is that a word?) & too much time spent looking into and exploring tide pools.

Thanks to a friend, sharing this sign………..it reminded us we needed to go to the beach to breathe.

A few days away from reality will do all three of us some good.

Be back soon.

Would you like me to take your picture?

For over 31 years, our family has had the privilege of travel.

Of course while living in Europe, we were able to see the landmarks that are mostly found on the cover of jig saw puzzle boxes.  We have prayed in the most amazing cathedrals.  We have hiked up 400+ stairs and were there to see lightning strike the angel Gabriel atop Mont St. Michele.  We have stood in the bunkers at Normandy and had tears in our eyes as we gazed at the now empty beaches.  Mr. Right ran up, I took the elevator to the top of the Eiffel Tower.  We have stood in line to visit our nations’ capital. We have made funny faces in the mirrors at the Palace of Versailles.  We have seen Mt. Rushmore, The Corn Palace (a must see), the Crystal Cathedral, we have been passed by senior citizen nuns while hiking up to visit Neuschwanstein Castle in Bavaria, Germany.  We have even toured more factories than you can shake a stick at……. Hershey, Yankee Candle, Maple Syrup, Applets and Cotlets, Mercedes, wooden shoe factory in Holland, Tillamook Cheese and the list goes on and on.

Sometimes while visiting monuments or castles, there is no one around to take our picture.  So we take each others or hold the camera out in front of us to capture the moment in time.

After dining at the Space Needle this past Monday, we walked around the observation deck.  I started to notice a trend.  Everyone, well almost everyone, was looking at their phones.  They were texting their friends to tell them where they were.  They were snapping a couple of pictures here and there to post on face book.  We passed by table after table, group after group….all looking at their cell phones, iPhones, little devices that were in the palm of their hands.  I wanted to scream.  LOOK at the VIEW!  Be in the Moment!  Breathe it in People!  Memorize this moment in time so you can think back and relive the wonderful time in your life.  Look at the person you are touring with.  Talk about where you are.  Be Still and just be. 

We chose to leave our cell phones in the glove compartment of our car.  We did indeed bring our camera.  So while I am acting all high and mighty about “be in the moment”, yes, we do like to take a couple of pictures to remember and to share.   I am too judgmental sometimes.  The times they are a changin’ Gladys!  Let’s move and embrace the future?  While I still think some of us could put down the cell phones just a bit……………………………something hit me……………………………………………smack me silly and call me Sally!

People were gracious and offering to help.  Yes, you read that correctly.  People young and old were offering to help each other take pictures!  The young tattooed hipster was taking a picture of a 60 something couple in their Sunday best.  A young girl about 10 was taking a group picture for some teenage girls.  People were talking to each other and offering to help preserve their moment in time.  Many languages were being spoken, some were pantomiming they would “snap” a picture.  Now, whether those pictures get printed and put into a sterling silver frames or they get posted instantly to Facebook or some other social media is up to the individual people.

I thought it was lovely, simply lovely to know that manners & kindness were alive and well.  People willing to help each other take a simple picture of their group.  Yes, it is a small thing.  It was a small thing that I was so happy to see.

The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.  ~Oscar Wilde